Tell Me Again About The Night I Was Born

it was october 31st 1999

the back ache began sometime in the morning

i was due two weeks earlier, so i thought that was the culprit of the pain.

jordan was dorothy from wizard of oz and still needed earrings to complete the costume,

so the 4 of us headed to alderwood mall, i had to rest at a kiosk, while john took her into clairs.

i did gain 60 pounds mind you, so i figured i was tired and uncomfortable, with good reason.

we lived in an apartment in edmonds at the time, and i never put much thought into how many trick or treaters we would have, i was rapidly running out of candy and sent john to safeway for lots more.

i had pinned the baby's costume on to my overalls upside down, because that's how the baby was facing. { a cute little pumpkin costume, complete with a hat shaped like a stem} all the while john was saying, "i think you're in labor," i pushed his worries aside, because it was halloween and i had false labor a week ago! and there was no way i was going to be embarrassed like that again!

well john came home from the store { while he was gone i ate, couldn't believe how hungry i suddenly was!}

he came home, asked how my pain was and i told him i was feeling 'better' i wasn't feeling that bad anyhow- remember- just a slight back ache. finally i decided that laying down for a few might help.

i called the hospital {because it was halloween and evening time, hence the dr. office being closed} the on call doctor told me i could take an ibuprofen, oh and by the way, how far apart are your pains? 'oh i don't know, maybe 10 min. apart or so...'

a little while later i thought maybe a hot shower would help more than laying down, and might help keep my mind off everyone telling me i was in labor. while i was in the shower, john decided to take alex and jordan to their mom's house so she could take them trick or treating, meanwhile i hung out in the hot shower ignoring the phone ringing off the hook.

how many people did john tell this story of me being in labor to? oh well. i wouldn't look stupid when it wasn't true. he would.

after sometime in the shower i emerged to find him waiting for me in the living room. what was he up to?

'let's go' he tells me

'let's go where?'

'the hospital'

'you know, if it will make you feel better, i'll go, but you'll see, i'm right- you are wrong'

he tells me that he has been through this twice before, and that it's not a good sign that i'm bleeding. {TMI- sorry}

so we head off to the hospital, no bags that i remember- just us. because i wasn't having a baby today!

we enter through the emergency and find a few people in line waiting for a nurse to come back to the counter.

i'm holding by belly because it is so large that there really is no other place for my hands to be.

people turn to look at who has come in the door.

they see me.

i remember someone saying "is she in labor?"

john says yes

i laugh at him, just like i did all the way to the hospital, denying anything having to do with labor.
{boy was i getting mad at him}

the woman takes his side and leaves the lobby to find a nurse for us...

all the while, others in line are saying that i can go ahead of them. this really can't get anymore embarrassing. or can it?

a nurse comes hurrying in- with a wheel chair!!! and if you know me, i am way too stubborn to sit in a wheel chair when i am completely capable of walking! so thank you very much but i'll pass on the sympathy.

i bid the fellow emergency room waiters good bye, all the while thinking 'i sure as heck hope they aren't still here when i have to leave out these doors with this baby still in me.'

so i insist on walking and the nurse pushes the wheel chair aside and reminds me that it's kind of a long walk.

and i reassure her that i will be just fine thank you very much.

we wait for the elevator, and i worry that i might still be bleeding, so i ask john to walk behind me in case.

he puts up with my insanity and does as i ask.

we get to the room and i have to pee...again! how many times can one person pee i ask to no one inparticular.

the nurses get me into bed to check me.

now remember that i am 19, i know how babies get here, i just have no idea what the process is like or what anything means.

"WOW! your dilated to 8 1/2!!!! is this not your first child?"

"what? yes it's my first child! and what does this 8 1/2 thing mean?"

oh! you only go to 10?!?!

well that means i'm in labor! and i'm not ready!

i know my sweet husband wanted to say those lovely words of "i told you so" but once again he was smarter than i give him credit and he kept his mouth shut.

still not in as much pain as i thought i would be, like i had seen on TV, i resisted any pain meds.

they insisted, i gave in, labor stopped.

baby's heart rate dropped

i was in danger

a c-section was needed

my baby was born at exactly 4:00am on november 1st



this little boy and i have a very special connection, we didn't meet for HOURS

he was rushed off to the I.C.U and i was knocked out from all the drugs

when i finally got to meet him, i was worried i wouldn't know which baby was mine...

would they all be laying in plastic beds side by side with no way to know whom belonged to whom?

as i was led into the icu, i instantly knew who my son was, the sweet nurse had him sitting up in her hands, waiting to meet his mom. all the tubes and i.v's and monitors connected to him made it hard to hold him comfortably, but we were determined to be together, he looked up at me and i knew he was my son.

5 long days later we got to bring our baby home

i sat and held him, he slept with me, i didn't want to share him...

and to this day, i don't share him.

we share a bond, and i can't believe we have shared it for 9 years,

i love this boy...

and so i share our story

our story about the night he was born