Glad it's over

I wanted to thank all of my friends who came to my side on March 22. I needed you and you were there... I am touched that you remembered my baby on this very hard day for John and I. I didn't want him forgotten. And even as I write this I am filled with emotions, some glad that I made it through, some sad that this happens to families, some joyous to move toward healing and some just plain numb. I am glad to be at a point where I can stop thinking every moment about our ultrasound and start thinking about planning our next move.
Thursday, I took my first personal day ever. I did nothing for others, I didn't answer calls, didn't get the mail, didn't clean, cook or vacuum; and sort of got dressed. I kept Chastin home from school to enjoy a day of just being. We mapped out our day to go something like this - Walmart in Marysville (upon Kelly's recommendation to check it out) Sam's club to waste time and then to Sky nursery for our tree for the baby. John pulled out all the stops known to man to keep me distracted. Bless his heart. I still couldn't shake the fact that I was scheduled to be having a c- section at 6:00 am, that I shouldn't be home, I should be filled with joy, surrounded by family cooing over our new precious little baby. I wanted to be there, not here!
As the day wore on I ate all the chocolate that Kelly had brought by to help put me in a chocolate comma. It worked!! I dug in the front flower beds with Shilo and planted bulbs we picked up at Sam's club. Then hung out in fresh p.j's and finished off my day with Baskin Robbins chocolate peanut butter ice cream. Over all I shed very few tears and felt really optimistic. I feel as though the whole experience has drawn John and I closer-stronger, we have seen sides of each other that I don't feel we would have seen in any other way. My testimony has grown by leaps and bounds. The out pouring of love and support that my family has received is unmeasurable, and we are truly thankful for you. For all the tissues you have loaned, the meals you have cooked, the flowers and plants you have brought, the tears you have shed with me to the cards you have sent, to the shoulder I could cry on; to the distractions, words of support and listening ears you have given me, I am, so thankful for you and am moved by your love for me. When I feel that the road is ruff and life is being unfair I know that I have you to turn to. Thank you....


About our tree- it is a Black Tulip Magnolia. It is a new breed that has come out. The flowers are like giant tulip heads that are a deep purple hue.(one of my favorite colors) It is beautiful!The man at the nursery helped us pick the strongest tree they had, and one of the only ones to have blooms already. We planted it in the front yard on the corner of the lot. It should grow to be 15-20feet tall, and will bloom every year around this time. I felt like that was important, to have something beautiful to look forward to each spring.

So now as things stand, my sweet spirited Chastin is having the hardest time of all. He cries almost nightly, he is such a sensitive child. Our approach has been listening, then positive conversations, then pointing his mind in another direction.. like where we should go on vacation or what should we plant in our garden this year? It seems to help.

I would like to especially thank Paige for being understanding and providing me with positive stories of similar situations, for helping me look for the lesson in this and helping me to see that life will go on. And for remembering us on our day, with a beautiful note and happy sign.
My most sincere thanks,

Also a thank you to Kelly, who rushed to my side day and night, the day of the ultrasound to the day before the surgery (delivery) to days, and weeks and longer after.Who listened to my endless crying and gave me endless tissues and hugs. Who called to check on me while she was on vacation with her husband. It really meant a lot to me...Thank you for your encouraging words and smiling face. I am grateful for your support.

Now if your anything like myself you'll find yourself teary eyed, but don't be. We are blessed and thankful for the two (sometimes four) beautiful children we have that bring us joy and love every day..

Easter Memories

Isn't it funny how little kids can remember the strangest things from a long time ago? As I was getting Shilo Mae into bed she asked how long till Easter would be here. I told her a couple of weeks, and out of the blue she said "what color eggs do I get this year? I can't wait to go finding them!' Now in our house each child gets their own color of egg to find. we started this a couple years ago to level the playing field for the little kids. When you have four kids things need to be even, so each child is assigned a color, then we fill them equally with candy, little erasers, stickers and of course some money.
Lately one of my nanny kids has been bringing an Easter basket with pretend strawberries for me to hide and him and Shilo to find. Boy do they ever get a kick out of it! It's so much fun to watch them scramble around the living room laughing and yelling to each other that they "found another one!"So any way, back to Shilo and the eggs - Figuring that she wouldn't remember I asked her what color she had last year and she said " mmm" with a finger to her lip " I had pink! This time can I have purple like my room?" Well, I can barley remember what month it is never mind the color of egg I was filling at midnight the night before Easter Sunday for each kid, so I told her I'm sure she is right and that she can certainly have purple this year! She is such a cutie that I just feel so blessed that heavenly father chose me to be her mother. Lucky me!

Ultimate smack down

The ultimate smack down is the new fun at our house.

John comes home and wrestles on our bed with the kids.

We all crack up and the kids look forward to this every evening,

they can hardly wait for their dad to change out of his work clothes and into his "play clothes" Shilo calls them, so they can get right to the fun!

John is an Ultimate fighting fan, so the kids get all the new moves tried out on them.

(Gently of course)

They even have the correct terminology down for the different types of moves.

You gotta love something with the name- bare naked choke hold. Makes me laugh just saying it.

"A moment to live"

" A moment to live"

a moment to live
a moment to cry
a moment to realize how suddenly we die

A moment of laughter
a moment to capture
this moment that is fading ever so faster

A moment to unwind
a moment this is so kind
a moment that many of us try to find

A moment of peace
a moment to unleash all the pain and experiences
that have kept us out of reach

A moment of grace
a moment that keeps us out of the race
a moment to thank God for
his love that keeps us in his place

But the moment of all...
Is the biggest moment that is important
To us all...

Gabriella Maria Pilato

I hope we all can take a moment this week to be grateful for life...
I know we are..

BABIES x TWO

This picture was taken the day of my sisters baby shower.
(she's actually my sister in-law)I was five months and she was weeks from her due date. The relatives were all a buzz that we were both pregnant at the same time.
We played the typical silly baby shower games, my sister opened a ton of pink baby necessities, and we all had a good time. Something I had never heard of was an old time tradition where the seventh person to the left of the 'mom to be' was supposedly the next one to have a baby. Well guess who that next person was... ME! You can just imagine the laughter when they counted down the row of seats to find me, number seven!

The gathering was a hit. And my sis left with a trunk full of goods. The guests joked that it was a duel purpose shower cause I was in line for her hand me downs. We have had quite the rhythm of sharing- maternity clothes, baby clothes and then "fat clothes" for after baby. I hope we can keep the timing right so we don't both need the same things at the same time in the future:)
P.S Deandra,
I want to borrow that cute sweater set next time!!

6 of my favorite things

I feel like I have already done a favorite things page about my treasures but this is a little different, so I'll give it a try. Paige said we should both do it and then Kelly tagged me so here goes. (and I'm not stating the obvious like my husband and kids)

• The Bahamas would make it on this short list of mine. I've been there a couple of times and I'm in love! The people are amazing, the atmosphere is majestic and the food divine! There's not much to do but lay on the beach in the warm sun and snorkel. The fish come and run into your legs and nibble at your swimsuit - it's unlike any other place I've ever been!

• Milk glass!!! One of my favorites for sure. I'm always on the look out for pieces I don't have or have never seen before. The thrill is in the hunt for me; Hobnail is my all time favorite, you see lots of vases in this design, so when you come across a fruit bowl or cake stand, it's the ultimate high...

• Good food. I'm not picky. If I don't have to clean it up, I am all for it! I take true enjoyment in a good plate of food. Sad, I know, but true. I like anything from a classic Dicks burger to a night out at The Met. I'm always up for Birthday cake sundae at The Cold stone creamery.MMMM...

• My new Cannon Rebel XTi. This baby takes super fast shots, previews your pictures in black & white, color or sepia, has a wide variety of lenses, flashes and a hole heap of other features I have yet to learn.

• A great Rummage sale, junk sale or the like. I enjoy the hunt for old things to be given new life. One of my favorites has to be the one put on by The Farm Chicks, in a little town near Spokane where sellers and buyers alike come from all over the place, set up, and make bargains like crazy!

• Magazines!!!!

• And last but not least - my garden. In all stages, from tilling to planting to endless watering. The best part is obviously the bounty. There is nothing like fresh picked strawberries and raspberries for dessert. Or the look on someones face when you give them a paper bag filled with fresh veggies and a basket of apples. I really love my hands in the dirt. The time spent growing, picking and weeding with my four kids is so much fun, it gives me a little one on one time with each of them. We plant every thing we need to make fresh salsa ( that my Hispanic neighbor taught us to make), pumpkins for Halloween, and beets for my mom in law and sugar snap peas to eat while waiting for dinner on the BBQ to be done. One day my husband and I will own our own piece of heaven in Montana where I will have acres of fruit trees, endless rows of veggies and chickens for fresh eggs. I guess I am a country girl at heart.

• And there you have it - a few of my favorite things. ( 7 to be exact) So now I will tag my friend Rebecca to share a few of her favorite things.

Our trip to Longview

We swam in the pool...

Played in the rain...

Stayed up way to late...

Ate too much junk....

Had a wonderful time!

Thanks great grandma Margaret!

Friday nights

Back in the day I would have been out on Friday nights

At the beach for a Bonn fire

Or at the drive in movies

Maybe out to a late night dinner with friends

Or perhaps out of town for a long weekend getaway

Not anymore! This has become my Friday nights!

Me, two babies, and an Ikea cutting board I accidentally set on fire while trying to heat up hot water for Audrey, my niece.

Oh what a night...

The scary part is that I enjoy it even more than those fun nights out on the town! (don't get me wrong, I still like to have those nights out, just not as frequently as before)

What do you do on your Friday nights?